Photos - 9/26/10

Introducing "Reese"

Since losing our beloved Xander, Blayke has been begging for another guinea pig. Being our little chocoholic, his birthday wish was, "a brown guinea pig to name Chocolate!"

We found our sweet baby girl tonight, Reese:

Photos - 9/7/10

Our Labor Day Surprise...

Rylie labored through the night to gift us with a sweet, handsome new buckling!

Introducing Ryden:

Free Community Night @ AHA! Children's Museum

Thurs, Sept. 23 from 6 - 8 PM

Sponsored by the Lancaster Police Department and DARE

Article: Ten ways to build your child's self-esteem

Nurturing your child's self-esteem may seem like a hefty responsibility. After all, a feeling of self-worth lays the foundation for your child's future as he sets out to try new things on his own. "Self-esteem comes from having a sense of belonging, believing that we're capable, and knowing our contributions are valued and worthwhile," says California family therapist Jane Nelsen, co-author of the Positive Discipline series.

"As any parent knows, self-esteem is a fleeting experience," says Nelsen. "Sometimes we feel good about ourselves and sometimes we don't. What we are really trying to teach our kids are life skills like resiliency." Your goal as a parent is to ensure that your child develops pride and self-respect — in himself and in his cultural roots — as well as faith in his ability to handle life's challenges (for a school-age child that may mean giving a dance performance for you). Here are ten simple strategies to help boost your child's self-esteem:

Give unconditional love. A child's self-esteem flourishes with the kind of no-strings-attached devotion that says, "I love you, no matter who you are or what you do." Your child benefits the most when you accept him for who he is regardless of his strengths, difficulties, temperament, or abilities. So, lavish him with love. Give him plenty of cuddles, kisses, and pats on the shoulder. And don't forget to tell him how much you love him. When you do have to correct your child, make it clear that it's his behavior — not him — that's unacceptable. For instance, instead of saying, "You're a naughty boy! Why can't you be good?" say, "Please don't throw the football in the house. A football is an outside toy."

Pay attention. Carve out time to give your child your undivided attention. That does wonders for your child's feelings of self-worth because it sends the message that you think he's important and valuable. It doesn't have to take a lot of time; it just means taking a moment to stop flicking through the mail if he's trying to talk with you or turning off the TV long enough to answer a question. Make eye contact so it's clear that you're really listening to what he's saying. When you're strapped for time, let your child know it without ignoring his needs. Say, "Tell me all about what happened at soccer practice, and then when you're finished, I'll need to make our dinner."

Teach limits. Establish a few reasonable rules for your child. For instance, if you tell him to wear his helmet when he rides his bike in the driveway, don't let him go without it at his friend's house. Knowing that certain family rules are set in stone will help him feel more secure. He'll start to live by your expectations soon enough. Just be clear and consistent and show him that you trust him and expect him to do the right thing.

Support healthy risks. Encourage your child to explore something new, such as trying a different food, making a new friend, or riding a skateboard. Though there's always the possibility of failure, without risk there's little opportunity for success. So let your child safely experiment, and resist the urge to intervene. For instance, try not to "rescue" him the minute he's showing mild frustration at figuring out how to read a tricky word. Jumping in to say, "I'll do it" can foster dependence and diminish your child's confidence. You'll build his self-esteem by balancing your need to protect him with his need to tackle new tasks.

Let mistakes happen. The flip side, of course, of having choices and taking risks is that sometimes your child is bound to make mistakes. These are valuable lessons for your child's confidence. So if your child misses the school bus because he was dawdling in his bedroom, encourage him to think about what he might do differently next time. That way his self-esteem won't sag and he'll understand that it's okay to make mistakes sometimes. When you goof up yourself, admit it, says Daniel Meier, assistant professor of elementary education at San Francisco State University. Acknowledging and recovering from your mistakes sends a powerful message to your child — it makes it easier for your child to accept his own difficulties.

Celebrate the positive. Everyone responds well to encouragement, so make an effort to acknowledge the good things your child does every day within his earshot. For instance, tell his dad, "Peter did all his chores today without prompting." He'll get to bask in the glow of your praise and his dad's heartening response. And be specific. Instead of saying "Good job," say, "Thank you for setting the table for dinner." This will enhance his sense of accomplishment and self-worth and let him know exactly what he did right.

Listen well. If your child needs to talk, stop and listen to what he has to say. He needs to know that his thoughts, feelings, desires, and opinions matter. Help him get comfortable with his emotions by labeling them. Say, "I understand you're sad because you can't go to the sleepover." By accepting his emotions without judgment, you validate his feelings and show that you value what he has to say. If you share your own feelings ("I'm worried about Grandma. She's very sick"), he'll gain confidence in expressing his own.

Resist comparisons. Comments such as "Why can't you be more like your brother?" or "Why can't you be nice like Evan?" will just remind your child of where he struggles in a way that fosters shame, envy, and competition. Even positive comparisons, such as "You're the best player" are potentially damaging because a child can find it hard to live up to this image. If you let your child know that you appreciate him for the unique individual he is, he'll be more likely to value himself too.

Offer empathy. If your child compares himself unfavorably to his siblings or peers ("Why can't I throw a football like Nicholas?"), show him empathy and then emphasize one of his strengths. For instance, say, "You're right. Nicholas is good at throwing a football. And you're a fast runner." This can help your child learn that we all have strengths and weaknesses, and that he doesn't have to be perfect to feel good about himself.

Provide encouragement. Every child needs the kind of support from loved ones that signals, "I believe in you. I see your effort. Keep going!" Encouragement means acknowledging progress — not just rewarding achievement. So if your child is struggling with a math problem, say: "You're trying very hard and you almost have it!" instead of "Not like that. Let me do it."

There's a difference between praise and encouragement. One rewards the task while the other rewards the person ("You did it!" rather than "I'm proud of you!"). Praise can make a child feel that he's only "good" if he does something perfectly. Encouragement, on the other hand, acknowledges the effort. "Tell me about the game. I saw you really hustling out there" is more helpful than saying, "You're the best player on the team." Too much praise can sap self-esteem because it can create pressure to perform and set up a continual need for approval from others. So dole out the praise judiciously and offer encouragement liberally; it will help your child grow up to feel good about himself.

From http://www.babycenter.com/0_ten-ways-to-build-your-childs-self-esteem_67755.bc
by Sarah Henry, Reviewed by the BabyCenter Medical Advisory Board

Safety Reminder: 9 Lifesaving Car Seat Rules You're Probably Ignoring

Rule #1: Make Sure Shoulder Straps Are in Proper Position

When baby is rear-facing, the top of the shoulder straps have to be at or below the baby's shoulders. When forward-facing (which your baby shouldn't be), they need to be at or above. This is measured perpendicular (at a right angle) from the recline of the back of the seat, not from the ground. When in doubt, put a popsicle stick into the slot with your baby in the seat to check -- sometimes the fabric of the seat can make it hard to tell where the strap really is.

Rule #2: Rear-Facing Is the Responsible Choice

Unless your child has serious medical problems, they have to rear-face until they literally cannot anymore. With all the new, cheaper seats with 40-pound or higher rear-facing limits, it's possible for anyone to have a seat that will keep their child rear-facing until the bare minimum of 2 years old and 30 pounds, as per the AAP's improved guidelines. But as they state, 2 years is the bare minimum -- your child is still significantly safer rear-facing until you cannot fit them that way any longer. After all, it's 500 percent safer.

Children's heads are a significantly larger portion of their body than an adult's and their spines are initially cartilage -- not bone. In the event of an accident, if their overly large head pulls on the weak spine (which doesn't fuse and harden until around 4 years old), they will likely suffer from internal decapitation -- this means that the cartilage and spinal cord inside their neck snap and they die instantly. It takes a serious medical problem to make that risk worth forward-facing a toddler before you absolutely have to. (I don't want to scare anyone -- this is all to help us keep our kids as safe as we can.)

Rule #3: No Gaps Allowed Between Baby's Crotch/Groin Area and Harness

This is really only an issue with newborns, but an important one. If there is a gap between crotch and harness buckle, roll up a washcloth or receiving blanket and put it in a upside-down U shape, with the middle between baby's crotch and the harness and the rest lying flat between the legs. This is one of the only "add-ons" allowed. When in doubt, call the manufacturer.

Rule #4: Be Sure the Chest Clip Is Positioned Properly on the Chest

The chest clip belongs between the nipples and armpits. This positions the straps so your child doesn't fly out of the seat -- and can cause damage when placed anywhere else.

Rule #5: Know the Proper Guidelines for Outgrowing a Seat

Outgrowing a seat has nothing to do with legs touching the seat. There has never been a case of legs breaking from touching the seat and even if there were -- would you choose for your child to break their legs or their neck? Only one of those can be fixed. Your child has outgrown a seat in weight when they reach the max limit for that position. This is non-negotiable. When rear-facing, your child has outgrown their seat in height when there is less than an inch of the hard shell left at the top of the seat above your child's head. This is measured perpendicular to the seat's recline. However, there is a new seat that has different guidelines -- so be sure to read the manual for your seat!

See how the strap can be pinched?
That means it's too loose.Rule #6: Straps Need to Pass "The Pinch Test"

The old rule of "two fingers under the chest clip" is outdated and resulted in straps that were way too loose. When straps are too loose, the child can fly out of the seat, or get stuck halfway and break god-knows-what.

The new rule is to first pull any slack tight from the lap-portion, and then pinch the straps at the collar bone (your fingers are pinching top-to-bottom as shown here). If you're able to pinch the strap, it's too loose.

Rule #7: Coats Are Not Allowed

A cop reports seeing a coat strapped into a seat, even after the child who had been wearing it flew out of it. Coats are not safe in car seats and almost all manufacturers have this rule in their manual as well. To understand why, place your child in a coat and put them in their seat and tighten the straps properly. Without loosening the straps, remove your child and remove their coat. Now place them back in the seat. That is how much room your child would have once the coat compressed under pressure, much like how you can squish a pillow if you sit on it. If there is more than a tiny bit of extra slack (like the difference between sweatpants and stretch pants), the coat is too bulky. Instead, try taking your child's coat off right before putting them in the seat, buckling them in quickly, and then putting their coat back on them backward. I also keep blankets in my car for safety in case I'm stranded, as well as for the kids to use in winter. I even just bought two patterns of the Kid Snuggie ($14.99 to $26.99) at Toys R Us for both of my children to use while in the car, or you can buy a car seat poncho.

Rule #8: RTFM (Read the #^!&ing Manual)

Most car seats have a specific location for the manual on the seat so that it's kept with it at all times. That's because almost every single question you could have is listed in that little booklet, and the manufacturer's number is there for anything else. Use it. Even car seat pros utilize this booklet. Every single car seat is different with different rules, and this booklet (or the PDF of it online if you lost yours) is your golden ticket to proper car seat usage.

Rule #9: When in Doubt, Get Help

Skip the fire stations and police department -- they mean well, but often are no more trained than you are. Contact SafeKids at their website or at 1-866-SEAT-CHECK begin_of_the_skype_highlighting 1-866-SEAT-CHECK end_of_the_skype_highlighting.

There is no shame in asking for help, but there is shame in letting your ego or embarrassment stop you from making your baby as safe as they possibly can be.

From http://thestir.cafemom.com/baby/108322/9_lifesaving_car_seat_rules

Scholastic Book Clubs Rewards

I am excited to announce that we reached our Scholastic Rewards goal from last year and received our listening center! The set includes four pairs of durable, child-sized headphones and a splitter jack:

Preschoolers will begin using the listening center next week.

A huge THANK YOU to all of you who have placed Scholastic orders to help in reaching our goal! :)